Write to Have a Better Day
Hello Dear One,
I’ve been noticing how hard it is to take my own advice. In particular, telling myself to slow down, not worry about doing everything at once. Then a deadline comes in, an idea comes up and I’m stuck at my laptop. So, before we begin, let’s remember change can take time. We don’t instantly embody new ways of thinking – because, amongst other things, it’s biologically impossible.
In my last few weeks in Edinburgh, having packed all my lamps, I let myself have my phone beside my bed, something I was trying hard to avoid. I stayed up late looking at other people’s feeds, picked it up in the middle of the night and felt worse after scrolling. Liminal spaces, I firmly believe, should be for dreaming. So, I promised myself when I moved things would change.
Cut to living at parents. I left my phone and laptop in another room for the first few nights. I read more, got back to sleep quicker and in the morning spent time thinking about my day, my goals, my ideas. Then I took my laptop to bed, to continue writing. I saw the new season of ATypical was on Netflix (marvellous, if you haven’t seen it) watched an episode and, in the morning, spent almost an hour internet shopping. Not for exciting things, for basic things in the sale – which even after I’d ordered them left me flat and unsatisfied. I went through my day drowsy.
At times like this, I’ve learnt not to beat myself up, it’s not nice and it simply doesn’t work. Instead, I ask: what can I learn? I’m compassionate with myself – I know devices are made to be addictive and the social acceptability of being on your phone late at night or early in the morning fuels it as a habit. But I’m also more determined to stick to my rules.
I always find it easier to make changes when my environment shifts, but the truth is we don’t have to wait for something outside of ourselves to have a better day. We can make choices. This week is an invitation to consider anything you’d like to change and explore the benefits it would bring. And it doesn’t have to be something daily - we can become obsessed with that sometimes - it could be once a week, on a particular day or time of the month. The best thing is to write down your why. Remember this is not about being a perfect human being; it’s about shifting things that get in the way of enjoying your life.
I hope it helps. Support could be something physical, an amount of time, sharing your changes with a friend. This is your space to explore.
And you know that first part about slowing down? It means I’m taking a short break from this letter. I care deeply about what I say here and how I say it, so I need few weeks off. I did have an anxious thought, that you’d all hit unsubscribe, but I hope you’ll stick with me. I cannot be an advocate for mental health if I’m not taking care of my own.
Thanks for being here and being you.
All love,
Jo
P.S. - Remember the archives are always available and stacked full of content. Have a beautiful few weeks ✨